VDay apparently is not only another hue of feminism but also the dead end of feminism. A survey conducted by a feminist writer depicts that girl students cannot buy the word ‘feminism’ as it implies hating men and indulging in male-bashing which is grossly ERRONEOUS. Feminism in reality connotes ‘equality of sexes’ and ‘empowerment of women’. VDay is the new entrant into the world of phenomenon that seeks to create a safe and peaceful environment for women over the world.
The concept of VDay is inspired by Eve Enslers play “Vagina Monologues” that hit the famous Broadway theatre in the late 90s to showcase violence suffered by women across the world. In India the play has already been staged twice and now it made a comeback with VDay 2009, to stop assault against women. The play is directed by Mahabano Mody Kotwal of ‘Kumars at Number 42’ fame. That’s how I know her. I first watched her in that comedy soap opera on Star World, when I was in higher secondary. It was a witty show with wry humor. Sadly, it’s not on air anymore. I wish she made a comeback with that show as well. Eve Ensler spoke to about 200 women across the world and wrote this play, that portrays violence on women in the 90s. The very title of the play has shock value and one ponders why it had been named so? Vagina comes into play in most of the experiences of a woman’s life. It could be love, sex, menstruation, birth, orgasm or simply a physical aspect of the body.
As you can see, it is a monologue and not a dialogue. A monologue is when a person speaks to oneself. The other characters in the play cannot hear the initiated character but the audience can. It is a monologue because society compels a woman to push these experiences under the carpet, stuff meant to be locked in a closet and not to be uttered aloud! As a literature student, I’m drawn and inclined to theatre because Drama is a literary genre. People often confuse Shakespeare to a writer or novelist but he is first a playwright and all his plays were written to be performed and staged. Drama is a powerful tool: a voice for change and a call to action. Every monologue in the play is associated with Vagina. I have not watched the play but as a literature enthusiast read the same. One monologue goes “my vagina was my village”, which chronicles the witnesses of women put in rape camps, in Bosnia. The play keeps adding new monologues every year with more and more women being upfront and outspoken about the violence meted out to them.
‘Progressive’, is the apt word in todays global context; with the coming of age of science and technology but unfortunately violence against women never stops. There are stray instances of a Swapna who died of acid attack recently, of Rehanna, the popstar who was beaten black and blue by her boyfriend, of a school girl molested by a bus conductor and nevertheless the Mangalore pub attack on women. They might be strangers but they are bounded by a common thread of violence. Why? Because they are the fairer sex and can be taken for granted? Its time we say enough is enough and make the elusive goal of eve emancipation a reality!
There is a certain ambiguity in understanding gender equality in the context of today’s woman: bold, smart, independent, chic, steely grit and nerve and the list can be endless. The World boasts of many such women who breached barriers of caste, class, societal norms to carve their own identies. Identities as in those that are not confined to biological roles: a daughter, wife and a mother but those that she defined through her own potential and talent.
This ambiguity is best manifested by the media: Print and electronic; that portrays women who aced in every sphere. It presents a picture of Aishwarya Rai standing tall at Cannes Film Festival; Sunitha Williams flying high in a space shuttle; Indira Nooyi, CEO of PepsiCo, addressing a press conference; Kiran Desai, plush in the success of a Booker Prize; The gutsy Hillary Clinton in a race for the white house and a countless examples to quote. Having said that, the media is equally rife with dowry deaths, rape cases, sexual abuse/harassment, eve teasing, molestation cases, domestic violence and what not? Does all this evoke gender equality? You just never know that bad news about women exceeds good news about women and perhaps the good news about women fades into insignificance before bad news. If you recall, the media kick started the New Year with molestation cases at Mumbai where two women out of a hotel were molested: pinched, grabbed, touched, felt and squeezed; by a group of drunken men. Then there are dissenting voices of the moral police who say that women ask for it as they wear provoking clothes. What rot? A woman can be provoking in a Salwar too. Just because a girl sports a tee and jeans, she is not a bitch who asks for it. The same holds for rape. What is rape? It is illicit sexual intercourse without the consent of a woman and effected by force, duress, intimidation or deception as to the nature of the act. When a woman is raped, the rapist goes scot free; it is the victim who is traumatized. The society is not kind enough to support her; she is looked down like a piece of dirt and some perverts who say that she asked for it. What about rape in wedlock? Is it rape at all? It’s not an outsider, her own husband who she is wedded to. So where does the question of rape arise? Rape is illicit without the benefit of marriage and if within marriage it’s a breach of promise to embrace and support her in sickness and health. If Eve Teasing is still prevalent, no wonder women are still perceived as objects of desire. If men are subjects, women are objects. God is in heaven and all is right with the stinking world!
There are communities and families where a woman’s place is still confined to home and hearth and she is defined by her man. Imagine having to live in a place where you don’t have a voice. What happens when the woman raises her voice against some norm? She is torn, beaten and battered. That’s domestic violence for you! What if a woman is caught in a marriage seeped in domestic violence that renders her a mental and physical wreck? She should walk out of that marriage and lodge a complaint against the proprietors of the crime. Our government finally woke up to the ill-plight of women and passed an act on 23rd June, 2005 that declares any domestic violence against women, a crime. It’s not just a husband who is deemed but also a relative will be charged with a criminal offence.
However such Laws will be efficacious only if the victims come forward and fight for justice. Most women only suffer than prefer to come and speak out against their family. It is against Indian culture. For heavens sake, Indian culture doesn’t ask you be a silent sufferer and mute spectator to the injustice and pain inflicted on you. Judith Armstrong, a well know critic stated “Adultery is greater when committed by a woman. She’s called a fallen woman and when a man commits adultery he just STRAY’s.” I refuse to buy that bilge. There should be equal punishment meted out to both. From time immemorial society is a male dominated one. A woman’s husband was a pathi parmeshwar or God to her. Though the old veil girl has seen the light of the sun, she is definitely facing a gender bias which is a manifestation of what I had mentioned earlier. Today some old traditions have come in a new garb. We had ‘sathi-pratha’: burning of a widow on her husbands’ pyre; and today we burn the bride and allow the groom to have another.
A much relevant example is Amniocentesis where the pregnant lady undergoes this sex-determination test under the pressure of her in-laws, even though it is an offence. Its disheartening that even today a girl is frowned upon as a yoke or a burden in families and it is appalling to know that the so called ‘affluent’ who are supposedly ‘educated’ are committing this crime. Even the middle income and poor income groups think that the birth of a girl child is a deliberative digging of a big pit because they are afraid of facing challenges regarding her education, huge dowry sums, wedding etc. They all look forward to a son to carry on their lineage or family business and also because a secure future is assured. Let’s face it, even at work, women face sexual harassment. It could be an innocuous remark, an unnecessary look or something more serious. A survey depicts that 49% women have encountered sexual abuse and 53% women don’t have equal opportunities at work. They also say that women are treated unfairly by their supervisor/ co-worker/fellow student.
Even amidst working couples, it is the man who has an edge over the woman. If he is transferred to a different place, the wife‘s interest is not taken into consideration, she is expected to move with him. However it’s ok for her to compromise on little things concerning work. Every man looks for a homely woman who can keep his parents and him happy but what if that homely girl wants to work? What if she is much successful than her husband and earns more than he does? Will the husband, acquiesce and digest this fact? Will his fragile ego not get wounded? The Newspapers do publish stories on Men who accept their trophy wives with ease and are absolutely comfort with the attention they receive. That’s only a smug-belief of a ‘feel-good-factor’. A woman’s life is circumscribed by a man. God has created female and man created a woman. Simone de Beauvoir, a landmark French feminist commented “A woman is not born but made”. All of the above breaks the façade that there is gender equality. It only presents a bleak picture of today’s woman.
If this myth has to become a reality, women should be educated and empowered, social responsibility should increase and boys at home should be taught to respect women. Entrenched prejudices and customs against women should be abolished and various myths, superstitions should be debunked. If Laws have to succeed, complaints should be made more anonymous that will encourage the girl to come forward and complain while scaring the miscreants.
VDay apparently is not only another hue of feminism but also the dead end of feminism. A survey conducted by a feminist writer depicts that girl students cannot buy the word ‘feminism’ as it implies hating men and indulging in male-bashing which is grossly ERRONEOUS. Feminism in reality connotes ‘equality of sexes’ and ‘empowerment of women’. VDay is the new entrant into the world of phenomenon that seeks to create a safe and peaceful environment for women over the world. 
